What it Is

I have proven myself a failure at being consistent. Methinks this should be a place for me. Maybe not the collected me that makes sense. More like the me that likes to be. To wonder, to plan, to think, to understand. I want to write everyday. It is my hope that this is the blog that will facilitate that goal.

I dont make any promises. You could still call this my creative blog. But I'd like to think of it more as the debris that is left behind after all the normal thoughts blow through my consciousness.

Don't expect it to always make sense or be worth your time. I think the main goal if for it to be my sanity.

Mottled Light

Mottled Light
the way my mind feels sometimes, waiting for a breakthrough.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Entry Twenty-Six

Didn't I say so?

Here I am again.

Apparently this is all I have to do with my free time.

Guess who had a the idea about vampires that don't eat humans before Stephanie Meyer? The writers of Supernatural.

2008 is almost over.

Entry Twenty-Five

I've decided that consistency is unnecessary.

You can't catch me.

There should be two today.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Entry Twenty-Four

24. Amazing show. Not the last season so much. Everyone has their flukes.

I bite my lip too much. I think it could become a problem. That and the fact that Alice is still resisting. Is functioning too much to ask?

Ow. It hurts. She hurt me, he hurt me, I hurt myself. But for the most part the wounds are superficial. I haven't been cut deep in a long time. Something for which I am grateful.

There are several benefits to a break from classes. One is the relax time. Another would be the pressure taken off the brain. I find that my mind cooperates more when it isn't being bombarded.

I can get some things written.

"Technological progress is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal."

That is not me. That is good old Albert. What an amazing guy. I think it would have been cool to know him.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Entry Twenty-Three

As long as I am listing things that I am in love with, I will add Supernatural to the list. It is my one guilty pleasure.

Alice is dead. Not dead, but dying. Her face is cracked, her eye-lids get tangled. They wont last much longer. Today she started crying. This caused a lot of problems. In defiance, she cut me. She now lies dormant in the Sears/Dillards parking lot. What am I going to do?

I kept my goal.

Thank goodness it's the time of year when sleep is all relative. Lose a couple hours at night, you have time to get them back during the day.

They are both so young! I'm trying real hard to get over it.

And his hair is so short.

Just about time to slumber.

Day two...lets make it three. You'll get tired of me soon.

Friday, December 26, 2008

Entry Twenty-two

I cant stop hitting the 'm' key tonight. I also cant stop falling in love with this Mexican band SiNo.

Who wouldn't love a band with such a contradictory name?

She is of two minds. I decided this a long time ago. How did it morph from the connections of people to the comatic (yes I just made up a word to take the place of the adjective "comatose". I like mine better anyway) insanity of a tragic heroin? I know you have to let it take you where it wants to go, but seriously? I'm not sure it has the slightest clue as to where its finaly destination lies.

Time for another from another country. They call themselves the Wombats. How fun.

A bathroom sounds like a good idea. Then it's time for gray matter to take a rest. Tomorrow has to happen. It is my goal and in more than one way. If only I were strong. And dont even think about pretending you know me. No one does 100%. I garuntee that. Not even me. And that is the sad thing. Everyone else is finding themselves. I just sit here and allow ideals to crash over me. I have visions and dreams of the person I could allow mysef to become. But who has that kind of pixy dust?

Now, to the place where you cant help but feel either relaxed or relieved...aka your bathroom (and not public bathrooms at all. They are two-hundred percent feeling awkward ad uncomfortable.)

I say yes. This was good. More and I can bulid a mountain of what no one will understand in the future.

Buy Menan! Did I do that right?