What it Is

I have proven myself a failure at being consistent. Methinks this should be a place for me. Maybe not the collected me that makes sense. More like the me that likes to be. To wonder, to plan, to think, to understand. I want to write everyday. It is my hope that this is the blog that will facilitate that goal.

I dont make any promises. You could still call this my creative blog. But I'd like to think of it more as the debris that is left behind after all the normal thoughts blow through my consciousness.

Don't expect it to always make sense or be worth your time. I think the main goal if for it to be my sanity.

Mottled Light

Mottled Light
the way my mind feels sometimes, waiting for a breakthrough.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Entry Eleven

Creativity has escaped me the last two weeks. There is no time for a spark or two of something that doesn't involve Ag law, genetics or Phylogenies. And that makes me a little sad. Of course I've been in a kind of rut for the past two months. I really hope to remedy that since creativity is an escape from all things mundane.

There is no real entry today. Simply the desire to have time to just sit down and plunk out something new. The weeks go by far too quickly for my taste. A blur of trying to keep up with all thats thrown at me. Between work, school and being Sunday School teacher, there is a lot that weighs me down. But I always look forward to the time before sleep, driving, naps where I just lay there and travel down new avenues of thought.

I was glad to do some finishing touches on the last entry and get it out yesterday. But that wasn't enough to quench my thirst for more. Thanks to Kirsten I now have something else to think about creatively. Our plan to make a "Muse"ical. She has a lot of the thoughts because she is the mother of this idea. I think that it could be amazing as long as no one has the idea first. Wouldn't it be so cool if we started this now and in 5 years somehow got it off the ground? It would be so amazing. We could be a new sister duo. We still need to work on getting that murder mystery we made together into something more cohesive.

Anyway. I would love a whole day or two off to just spend time updating "Spero" (it really needs it) and try out a few ideas that have been rattling round in my head for the last month or so.

Wow,it's almost February.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Entry Ten

Oh goody. My tenth entry on this blog. Took me long enough. I had planned to get a lot more posted over winter break. But it seems like these things never happen because I am too busy being lazy and enjoying doing nothing. I got several new ideas down, but not much else. The only thing I know is that I have a lot of changing to do. Heres an excerpt that isn't quite done but will have to do since I feel so bad for not having ANYTHING new lately. It's intent is to reveal the effects of the drug Nirvana to the reader. It's effects are pretty typical for a hallucinogen. It takes place in the perspective of both Alae and Crash. Here goes.

It was nearly 6:00, the time when most of the Rats made their way to their various haunts. Alae was supposed to be in the bar an hour ago to help make things ready. One of their more formidible patrons was going to be here tonight and everything needed to be ready for his arrival. She was never this late and Crash was beginning to worry. Times the way they were, anything could have happened to her. He made his way to the basement and found Christian sitting at the small table absorbed in another optimist leaflet.
"Chris, have you seen your sister at all today?"
"Yeah. I thought she was with you. She stumbled in here around 2:00. She didn't look well." He shrugged. "I assumed she was going to get a head start on the evening. I haven't seen her since."
"How ill did she look?"
"She could hardly walk straight. I tried to ask her about it, but she ignored me and went up to the bar. She was pretty loud going about it."
Crash shook his head.
"Sometimes I just don't know what to do with that girl."
He made his way back up to the bar. There was no evidence that Alae had made any attempts to set things up or had even been there at all. There was nothing for it now. He would have to get things ready on his own. In the process of setting up the rest of the chairs he heard a loud exclamation through the paper thin flooring of the rooms above. It's was Alaes voice. He sighed. At least she was still in the bar. Crash made his way up the stairs fully ready to give that girl a verbal lashing.
****
Alae awoke from a deep sleep. Dreamless and blissful. She was upside down and the room around her sparkled with shimmering pinpricks of light. Alae smiled and reached out her hand. One light landed softly on her palm. She closed her fist around it and it exploded with a tiny "pop".
"Ouch!" She gasped and examined her palm. A red spot had formed which blossomed into a gaping wound that took up most of her hand. As she continued to stare, it began to bleed out what smelled and looked like cherry jelly.
"Stupid light," Alae mumbled and proceeded to lick the jelly from her hand which tasted much like hot apple cider. It was delicious and she was enjoying herself immensely when the snake came in and ruined everything.
****
When Crash found Alae, she was in a horrible state. She was lying on the bed of room 7 with her head dangling off the end. All the lights were off and the blinds closed. She was humming to herself as she methodically licked her empty palm.
"Alae, what have you done?"
This did not bode well. He made his way to the window and opened the blinds to let some light in. Alae cried out and shied away from it. Crash went to her side to help her off the bed.
****
The snake slithered in with a dry whispering and hissed at her.
"Alae, what have you done?" it demanded. Alae wondered vaguely how the snake knew her name and why it was speaking. Snakes don't talk. And then suddenly it was lunging at her with it's mouth agape. Flame belched forth from growing maw and Alae acted accordingly. She shot up and scrambled against the headboard of the bed, as far from the snake as possible. She pulled the covers up over her head.
"Go away! You can't talk! You don;t know me! There's no reason to breathe fire at me you'll burn the room down! Go away!!'
The covers vanished from around her as did all her clothes leaving her completely naked.
"Alae, c'mon. whats the matter with you?"
Terrified, Alae rolled herself off the bed. Why did the snake take her cloths? What was it going to do to her? What sinister plan did it have? She was not going to let a snake taker her virginity.
"GO AWAY!! Your a snake, you don't want me! Give me back my clothes!" She could feel the snakes scaly tail wrap around her wrist and try to pull her from her hiding place.
"Alae, stop this. I don't have your cloths, they're on you. And I'm not a snake. I don't know what your on, but you need to get out from under there."
Suddenly the snakes hissing was slow, long and soothing. It had given her back her cloths. She felt warm and safe. The snake didn't want to hurt her. She should do what it said. She rolled out from under the bed and tried to stand up. But when she did, the whole room turned upside dow n which made it hard to move. Everything smelled like chocolate.
"Do you smell that Mr. Snake?"
She tried to stand again, but the snake had wrapped it's warm scaly body around her and was lifting her up. She wrapped her arms around it. Held it close. Then it began to sniff her which was ridiculous because snakes don't smell.
****
Crash took Alae in his arms as she tried to stand again and failed. She wrapped her arms around his neck. A strong smell wafted into his nose and he began to sniff Alaes hair.
"Alae..."
"No, of course you don't. you don't smell, you taste. Does it taste like chocolate?" Crash carried her out of the room and made his way to the stairs.
"Alae listen to me. This is important. Did you take Nirvana?"
She rolled her head around to look at him.
"What a silly question. Here, lick my hand it tastes like apple cider!"
"Theres nothing on your hand love. Do you remember what you were doing before you slept?"
But she wasn't paying attention to him. She was licking her hand and humming to some unheard tune.